Monday, August 22

Sharing My Dreams

One of the hardest things about separating from Peace has been feeling that so many of my dreams have died along with the relationship.That they are no longer possible. We had so many shared dreams,so many plans for the future. So much we wanted to do together and with our children.

I have felt so empty and lost. These dreams were my direction in life, things I'd been planning for years, goals I had partly achieved. And now I feel that it is not possible to achieve them on my own.

There was the plan we'd been talking about for ages to take the kids on an adventure. We wanted to canoe up the North Coast of Queensland, near the Daintree Rain forest, camping in the wilderness.

Yes, technically,I probably could do this on my own with the kids,but it would not be the same. It would require a lot more work on my part, it wouldn't be as enjoyable or safe as doing it with another person; someone you trust, someone you know has the skills and knowledge to make it work.

It is like my dream of buying land and building a solar-passive, Eco, straw-bale house. Peace and I have been planning this for 13 years. We dreamed of buying land in Northern New South Wales, building our house, growing food, making amazing gardens, creating an adventure playground for grown-ups.

We wanted to make a place where people could come to learn and rejuvenate. Where we could share our skills in abseiling, rock climbing, massage, healing, permaculture, edible weeds and bush tucker.In bush craft and building and gardening.
A place where families could come to re-connect with each other.
A place where people could visit our home and see that living in an Eco-friendly house does not mean living in a mud covered hippy shack but in a beautiful home with all the modern comforts. And that it can all be created on a budget and by yourself if you choose.

And yes, it is probably technically possible for me to learn the skills I need and do all this on my own it would feel like something is missing without Peace.
The most enjoyable times I have spent with Peace are when we were building or in the gardens. When we are talking about plants, how much a tree has grown, looking at a spider web with the morning dew sparkling on it, when we garden together without even needing to speak but both knowing what we need to do. I find it hard to imagine myself building without being able to discus the construction of the window frames or the recipe for the render with Peace. Or the laughter and companionship.

Lately we have been talking and have come to the conclusion that maybe we can still do these things together. We can buy land and create all this and co-habit on the land in separate dwellings. We can both be accessible to the kids all the time. We can still share the dreams.

And now I am sharing the dream with all of you. I'm putting it out to the Universe and hoping it will happen.

We would love another family or two to share our land; people with similar ideas and dreams, to create a community. Maybe this will all happen one day.

10 comments:

Kimmie said...

Perhaps your time apart has made you appreciate Peace and all that he bought to your life. Sounds like you miss him to me!

;]

Nelly said...

I think thats a wonderful idea and I often say Id love to live like that and with others that had same ideas.I have been waiting for my actes of land for years and still have hope it will happen one day.

Anonymous said...

Am sure you can find a way through - trust in the universe to provide the solution even if it is not what you thought it might be at first. And by way of showing these things do work out - my parents have lived near each other but in separate dwellings for years, too many for me to remember! They spend Mon to Fri apart, weekends together working on their garden/land & are both really satisfied with the arrangement. They come together to see me some of the time & their grandchildren but enjoy & require time on their own too.

Hope whatever you do works out for you all.

In love xx

Anonymous said...

Just wanted to add I left the last comment - I don't like being anon & thought Google would recognise me!
Julie

www.julieslittlejoys.blogspot.com

A Blessed Life said...

I have pondered on this overnight and thought of all the dreams i had when I was younger and that had not happened.I think it is lovely that you can have a partnership of kinds with peace he and you still must have a lot of respect an love for each other,there are all kinds of love.
Just remember if this dream does not happen,it was not meant to but there will be another wonderful happening that perhaps you have not thought of yet at the same time,Faith will bring drams to reality.Bless your little family.

karisma said...

Your dreams are very similar to mine. Unfortunately, my husbands are rather different. I often wonder if I will ever live my own dreams. I hope yours come true. much love xoxo

Anonymous said...

I really liked the article, and the very cool blog

Hellena Post said...

Yeah, I wrote a big comment just after you posted this and it got lost!! I wanted to say that I've got a very similar dream, and have had it for a very very long time - to have land where people who need some time and space can just come and be - and find someone who they connect with and garden, or walk around - and we're in!!

And I reckon it's awesome you're hangin with the Peace man.....reminds me of when Currawong and I were going to live close to each other but not with each other, and decided we could do it well. And who knows what may come of it all?!

Best of luck with it all beautiful woman, and best of luck to Peace too....

Hellena Post said...

Yeah, I wrote a big comment just after you posted this and it got lost!! I wanted to say that I've got a very similar dream, and have had it for a very very long time - to have land where people who need some time and space can just come and be - and find someone who they connect with and garden, or walk around - and we're in!!

And I reckon it's awesome you're hangin with the Peace man.....reminds me of when Currawong and I were going to live close to each other but not with each other, and decided we could do it well. And who knows what may come of it all?!

Best of luck with it all beautiful woman, and best of luck to Peace too....

Eirini said...

Dreams are never ever lost!They come in their own time and form!All we have to do is keep sending our loving energy to them and keep living our life until they come true!Seems that you miss the man along with the dreams,too...Nothing wrong with that!Every outcome is perfect!

Related Posts with Thumbnails